New Years Resolution: Put yourself First…Female Masturbation

Masturbation is healthy. It has many emotional and physical benefits and best of all it feels good. So this year we should promote self awareness and discovery, both emotionally and physically. Start by taking your pleasure to new heights all by yourself, and you will find that by learning your body you will help both your relationship with yourself, but also with your partner.

Preparing yourself for Pleasure

There are many ways in which you can prepare yourself to give yourself pleasure, just as you would if you were preparing for a partner.

Make yourself feel sexy. Just as if you were getting ready for a hot date with your partner, preparing yourself for a fun evening home alone is also beneficial. Shaving and trimming your hair, from your legs to you pubic area will help make you feel beautiful, you feel sexy. Having a long and sensual bath to help yourself relax and enjoy your body is also and fun way to prepare for the bedroom.

Set up your room. Prepare the room in which you plan to enjoy yourself. Light your favorite scented candles and turn on some music, turn down the lights and put any toys, lubricant or erotic literature you plan to use within easy reach.

The best advice would be to be relaxed as you masturbate. Involve all parts of your body like the breasts and nipples. Become aware of how it feels to you so you can bring that feeling back or share it with your lover later. Don’t try to have an orgasm, just release yourself and enjoy your body. Give yourself permission to experience intense sexual pleasure.

Accessories: Toys, Books, DVDs

There is no right or wrong way to masturbate; as long as it feels good then it is good. Women can use anything from your fingertips to toys and anything from books to videos to enhance their pleasure.

Clitoral Vibrators: Vibrating toys are a fun and satisfying way to enhance your sensual pleasure. They help by providing the intense vibration externally to your clitoris and vulva area. This can help bring orgasm much quicker and with more intensity. Some popular clitoral vibrators are the Lelo Nea and the Fun Factory Layaspot. They have a great curve that fits nicely over the women’s pelvis and a variable speed button so you can choose the right intensity for you. Tease yourself at the low speed or fast and intense.

Internal Vibrator or Dildos: Dildos and vibrators that can be used internally as well as externally are especially fun and fulfilling. You can get the fullness and penetration from these toys or use them externally for clitoral stimulation. Dildos such as the Fun Factory Curve do not provide any vibration so it is often nice to add a clitoral vibrator like the simple Silver Bullet for external pleasure. Or use a dual action sex toy like the Rabbit Habit that provides both internal penetration as well as clitoral stimulation at the same time. Have you tried stimulating your G-spot? Customer favorites have been the Lelo Gigi or the G-spot E-glass. You don’t need to penetrate your vagina with toys but it may help, it is a personal preference.

Books and DVDs: Erotic literature and movies are sexy and exciting ways to rev your mind and body into thinking and feeling sensual and excited. Books such as The Mammoth Book of Erotica or Aqua Erotica are easy to read and provide an exciting array of fantasies to prime your mind into thinking sensually. Arousing the largest sexual organ-the brain; will arouse your body. Studies have shown women are just as aroused as men when it comes to watching erotic movies. You just need to do a bit of research as to which movies would be more appealing to you. There are plenty of X-rated films now directed by women for women.

Masturbation is meant to be a fun and enjoyable way of self discovery, free from guilt and worry. It is a healthy and beautiful way to enjoy yourself, and learn about your sensual body and all the orgasmic pleasures it can receive. This new communication with yourself is often helpful both in your sexual relationships but also in loving yourself more completely. So in 2009, love yourself and have fun doing it!

Music Can Electrify You Sexually

Music is a powerful aphrodisiac. Music has the ability to heighten any emotion we are feeling or put you in a completely different mood.

Think of when you come home after a long day at work. You often feel as if you don’t have an ounce of energy left. You turn on some music and you feel instantly energized. Another example would be during an exercise routine. Running on a treadmill can make twenty minutes feel like two hours yet when you turn on some music you instantly feel more power and bounce in your step. This is because through music our bodies release a natural feel good chemical called endorphins.
Take the power of music to the bedroom and you will see your sex life take on a whole new experience.

Be careful the type of music you play, the wrong tunes can make your partner feel sleepy or even sad. Not the type of mood that would lead to a sensuous night of love making! Some CDs mixed specifically for romance are the Exotica series. Chocotasy, Loveberry, Bananaism, and Asiamint. And each CD conveniently comes with four flavored condoms!

Finding the right music is very important. You don’t want to play the cliché love songs especially if they may remind your partner of their previous lover. Find something new or mix a CD with music you think you can both “get down” to. Upbeat and energetic would be best.

You also want to make sure the volume is high enough to get under the skin. To get both bodies grooving. Imagine the night club scene compared to a lounge. In a night club you feel to go wild and gyrate your hips. In a lounge the sounds are lighter and more soothing. You feel to just sit back and relax.

Combine the beat with a music activated sex toy device like the Ohmidbod or IBuzz and you will surely move your love making to the next level. Set up your MP3 (does not need to be an IPod) with the same music and plug the music activated sex toy to it. The toy will vibrate to the beat of the music! As you turn up the volume the vibrations on the sex toy also get stronger. To make sure there are no wires to get in the way slip it into the Ohmibod Garter and it will never get in the way during lovemaking and keep both partners hands free.

The IBuzz is a small bullet for super external clitoral stimulation. The Ohmibod Straight can also be used for internal as well as external stimulation with vibrating and pulsing modes. And now there is the Ohmibod G-Spot to hit that sweet spot and leave her with lasting memories! Whatever your pleasure, toys can be an exciting addition in the bedroom and they function on their own without being connected to a music player.

Keep the tunes fresh and new. There won’t be any associations with a particular song, just a brand new experience for the ears and body.

Music can help your partner feel free and lose their inhibitions. They may feel freer to express themselves vocally during sex which in turn can have an effect on their whole body expression during sex. Music is often a forgotten ingredient in the recipe for a fantastic sexual experience so next time you get plan to get your groove on with your partner make sure music is part of it!

Honey's Q & A: After Pregnancy Intimacy

Q: I had a baby two months ago. My heart and brain are screaming for sex, but my body is still saying ‘no way!’ Will I ever be able to enjoy sex again?

A: Congratulations on the new addition to your family. You can certainly enjoy sex after pregnancy. The key is going slow and listening to your body.

Much will depend on how much wear and tear you experienced while giving birth. If you were torn or had an episiotomy, it could take longer before you truly feel comfortable during sex. Exactly how long depends on a number of things, including how long you normally take to heal, the extent of tearing or type of episiotomy, length of labor and whether the delivery was assisted by forceps or vacuum extraction.

Kegel exercises, up to 100 per day, are one step to getting your pelvic floor muscles strong again. Find the muscles by imagining you’re urinating. Squeeze the muscles as if you were stopping the flow of urine. Let go and try again. Squeeze and release repeatedly to strengthen the vaginal muscles. Adding a toy designed to help with Kegels such as Smart Balls or Lelo Luna Luxury Balls can be helpful and fun.

Even without tears, you will likely notice your vagina does not lubricate as well as before. This is due to low levels of estrogen. Also, breastfeeding can increase dryness as lactating women produce fewer of the ovarian hormones that make you lubricate. This means a good water-based lube is a must.

Plenty of foreplay is essential too. Not only will it help move lubrication along, but if your body isn’t feeling up to the act itself, foreplay can be the main event. Plenty of cuddling, petting, oral sex and mutual masturbation will help keep you and your partner physically close.

As your body heals, you may find certain sexual positions you enjoyed pre-pregnancy and even while pregnant no longer feel comfortable. Rather than dwelling on this as a negative, use it as an opportunity to try new positions. You may be pleasantly surprised. Side-to-side or woman-on-top positions will allow you more control and put less stress on body parts that may still be healing.

Most of all keep communicating with your partner and keep a sense of humor. If pain persists, see your doctor.